I see what you want
I see what you feel
You wonder if it can be real
What if I knew
That what you sensed
Is not just imaginary mist
A dream, a ghost,
Is something that flows
Something that is a part of me
Something I know you don’t see
You only think you see me
The one you think you want
The one you think you feel
But what you don’t know
Is that you see straight through me
Blinded by a magic that is not mine
You follow me obliviously
Grazing the waves of my mind
A world made shallow with naivety
Numb to a depth unfathomable
Except for a tingle
That pulls you, holds you
Leaves you insatiated
I want you to stay
But I’m not what keeps you
It’s the reason I don’t trust you
I want you to know
But what would it mean
If you stood there in front of your dream
I can’t be the one to show you
There may be a chance
The glare of that glance
Will only make you want more
Of what blinds you from me
I want you to know
To see your dream
To share my dream
To see what you are sensing
I can’t hold your hand
But can you show me?
Show me my human side
How we share our insides
Show me that we are not that different
And that you like me for that
Show me that you see the magic
Of an ordinary day exploring the path
No black cats or rabbits in hats
Just a card game you never win
That you play over and over again
With your best friend
You will never know,
But I’ll play this game too
Until I see you see
The magic in ordinary you and me
We were walking back from the beach, the evening blue and moonlight submerging us as we followed the sidewalk to my front porch. No words, just thoughts, just senses. We walked for miles, exploring our inner worlds, our reflections. He still doesn’t know about my dreams. If he knew, it would change them. I want to keep them as long as I can. I can’t wake up now.
We approach my house. He hugged me a slow and disappointed goodbye. I walked toward my door but felt his hand on my shoulder.
“I want to know you. I don’t want to stop trying.”
I saw his eyes, serious and heavy. Without a sound he walked on, I looked back. I searched for my keys in my backpack but found the door was unlocked. I walked in…I woke up.
It was six a.m. The light in my room was as blue as it was in my dream. I lay there thinking about where I had been, wondering whether to go back or write it down. I didn’t want to see him anytime soon without finding a way to fill the space he suspected. I started writing.
Here in her videogame blanket she rides the wind
Electric guitar strings wiring her brain
Pink hair soaking
Clouds moving, skin glowing
Adventure in everything
Racing in the rain, a ride through the city
Speed in her dance, a fire across the world
She rises and falls, an epic wave slays
Skies beget her, trickling stardust and thunder
Never ending sky, so high the horizon she climbs
Thunder stomps across the atmosphere
Making way at the speed of light
The world opens up to her
Empty space surrounds
She can do anything
She steadies her eyes
She cranks into high gear
Fire spills, dropping out of the sky
She swims and soars, ducks and swerves
Flowing on the edge so easily
A smile curls in the midst of life and death
On the edge of her mortality
So alive, she’s breathing every moment
Surfing on the waves of her experience, her seconds
Her near misses
Surfing on the edge of immortality
Never feeling her superpowers
Glowing and growing like this before
She dives again
Nothing can stop her
Somehow she knows
Catching onto a snaking dragon
Together, roaring across the sky
The moon rises
She can touch its light
Smooth and cool
They slither to and thro
She feels them soaking in
Gliding into her electric veins
Soothing her restless heart
And its ceaseless desire for speed
In the black of my mind,
I ride the waves and follow them
to the island in my hands.
An undercurrent, a melody of an unknown song,
an invisible rope pulling me along.
A shadow flutters and whispers,
guiding where to go,
telling me to follow
the unknown bluish glow.
Force taking grip, emerging from the sea,
A tidal wave waiting to rush into reality.
Stumbling across the sparkling purple sand in a dazed confusion,
Learning the way through this beautiful, desolate place.
Not looking at it as a dream anymore, but as a second home.
Feeling the rich, warm air, sweet and milky tell me to fly.
Heart pounding with ethereal electronic joy.
Being with the wind, holding its hand.
I wake up.
He feels the dream world on me.
On the way home, riding through twilight and vast open fields.
The sky is a glowing blue shadow.
Serene and deep, we dive into it.
Wrapped up in a viscous blanket.
Immersed in waves of light.
Swimmers who could breathe in the deep.
Invincible and free.
Swimming in the depths of the open sky.
Swimming in the depths of life.
Running, picking up speed as I go.
I catch myself changing.
I’m listening, seeing, feeling.
The hills get steeper, I push harder.
Making my way through vertical adversity.
Leaning into the cement,
defiant eyes, heels on fire.
Chasing the city, chasing the moonlight,
chasing my internal world,
my spirit on a tight wire.
Running through the thick of my in-capabilities
Running through the periwinkle blue.
Running to prove myself,
Running beyond what I think I can do.
Running to find the metaphor.
Flying beyond the vast landscape
Running to find the answer
Moving to find my truth.