Photos · Poems

Blinded


Dizzy and stumbling
Trying to find the ground
After putting my world
In someone else’s hands.

Rising and falling
Back to reality
Not sure what to feel
What to do
Where…how…
Was it a dream?
Are you still there?
Where was I?
Are you anything more than a passerby?

Letting you go, pretending you’re not there
Doesn’t feel fair
I wonder what you’re feeling
If you feel any withdrawal at all
I wonder if any feeling I feel
Is real at all.

I don’t believe in my own longings
I fight myself all the time.
Out of sight out of mind
Walking around
Blinded by my feelings
Chasing your shadow.

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Photos · Poems

Like Lightning


Too long not chasing this bright pulse
Too long avoiding the rain
Ride this storm out
Ride it out
You and me
Connected in a flowing ever changing web
Of molecules and experiences
Coincidences that never stop
A deep unknowing
A vague understanding
We feel it out
We swim it through
Captivated by what we must do
We chase then hide
Curling up, sleeping it away
And suddenly we feel the kick start
Of our beating heart
And hope it isn’t too late
To seize this breathing wonder
Before all our fireflies drift away
Wondering if it’ll ever be okay
Wondering if it’ll all be alright
Wondering if I’m awake enough
To embrace the space
Between the earth and sky
And strike a little light in the world tonight.

Photos · Poems

Hold You There

Weightless
And it takes your breath away
Just before dropping
You dare to hold on
The rush of wind in your lungs
Freeing you from yourself
Letting it all go
Utterly alive
Utterly terrified
And flying
Feeling your heart flutter and race
As you plunge in the wonder of this vast abyss
The sparkling deep blue
Flowing up and down
Together and forever
Over and under
Sharing you there
Swooping, diving
I’ll hold you there
In the embrace of the night sky
Your spirit elevated
As light as a tear
I’ll hold you there
In our one and only time here

Photos · Poems

Away From the Flame


Stories are like marshmallows
Burning in campfires
Goey, messy, tough to control
A dance between you and the world
Burning in ways you didn’t expect
But making it all stick together
All the rich layers that can be bitter or brittle
Or melt under a warm touch
Or stay strong and steady through the thick and thin
Each marshmallow to be seen as too burnt or too white
All of them striving for that perfect tan
That perfect vulnerability that doesn’t kill you with carcinogens
A thin layer strong enough to hold a soft gushing heart

Photos · Poems

Beauty and Noise

The smell of plastic wrap
And CD cases
Old linoleum floors
Under squeaky converse laces
Holding the song in my hands
Excited to listen whenever
Excited to discover more
No more elusive mysteries slipping in and out of coffee shop doors
What other emotions and atmospheric worlds are in store?
Curious to finally see the lyrics
Curious to see the pictures inside
Wondering who they are, how they look like
The faces that hide behind the voices that bring me to life

They pile in the corner of my room
4 sided symbols of the past and all that’s in between
Collecting who I am and where I’ve been
Collecting the heartaches and friendships
The phases, fads and memories
Songs holding our names, our identities
Classifying you and me
Bringing us together
Bringing us apart
An art that’s more than beauty and noise
An art that gave us freedom of choice

It was a culture, a definition, a destination
It was dance, it was image
It was clothes, it was language

It was an extension of what lay underneath
It was an extension of you and me

Photos · Poems

Flickering


The comfort of the morning sun
The familiar trees and homes in my neighborhood
It was you
The safety and comfort of you
You gave me joy and peace of mind
You inspired the soft voice that helps me rhyme
It’s feeling you there
Obliviously as I ride through my day
Not knowing you’re in the back of my heart and mind
Not knowing you’re deeply spread all around

I only know when the light has gone away
When I shiver from the cold
The blue shadows, the grey cement
The crying lonely ache

Sometimes they are still there
The sunlit creamy warm hues
The bright green leaves and shiny grass
I remember
A candle lit
Trying to survive
Shivering, flickering
Through the wind and rain
Bracing destruction and change
Without being hurt or slain
Letting the hot wax drip down my veins
Sometimes I remember